Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
