why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
