my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
