you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Randomize
