your room smells of hookers.
And success
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
