She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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