It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
