I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Randomize
