And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
