i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear on the fireplace
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize