I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
