I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He shit in the fireplace
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
