I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
