Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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