so that wasnt chicken after all
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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