Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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