Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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