why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
