what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
