I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
