Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
