What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
