I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Success! We fucked roommates!
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize