My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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