Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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