I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize