The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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