what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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