We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
