come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
