i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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