My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize