I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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