porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.