i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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