I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
