She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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