I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Randomize
