so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
im drinking this country out of the recession.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
