every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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