Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
