Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg http://tfl.nu/z4cs
  Replies (5) Good night (658) Bad night (2848)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive. http://tfl.nu/qwvv
  Replies (19) Good night (6921) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids http://tfl.nu/xnc7
  Replies (19) Good night (6996) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  It was the best sex i've ever had.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): That was the scariest sex i've ever heard.... (1-540): It was the best sex i've ever had. http://tfl.nu/k8p9
  Replies (13) Good night (7869) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties. http://tfl.nu/q6j5
  Replies (5) Good night (2797) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well. http://tfl.nu/nn8d
  Replies (12) Good night (3141) Bad night (997)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters http://tfl.nu/qui3
  Replies (7) Good night (2570) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew http://tfl.nu/e4qx
  Replies (6) Good night (2486) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me. http://tfl.nu/euwh
  Replies (30) Good night (4891) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you. http://tfl.nu/pksa
  Replies (6) Good night (4835) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair. http://tfl.nu/ggur
  Replies (5) Good night (1620) Bad night (643)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents http://tfl.nu/oucv
  Replies (9) Good night (1908) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some http://tfl.nu/99sq
  Replies (5) Good night (1952) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store. http://tfl.nu/aft6
  Replies (0) Good night (422) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/55s3
  Replies (5) Good night (1260) Bad night (345)

Randomize