so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
this will be a night to untag.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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