i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize