just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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