It's Friday. Sex?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize
