i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
