hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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