): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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