just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
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